The Eagle Has Landed

Folks, after years and years of bitching about my job, I'm finally doing something about it. Starting next year, I'm going to work for a new company at a different kind of job and the pay, thankfully, is better.

So I hope you'll all stop by the Wendy's on Northwest Expressway near Council, where I'll be working my way up to the grill, starting first as assistant to the condiment intern.

As soon as I figure out which one is ketchup and which is barbecue sauce, I think this might turn into a career.

For more information about the job, feel free to take me out for drinks or to an expensive dinner. Those who don't live in the area can send gift certificates or cash which will be put toward pornography.

Love,
Assistant Pants